Chasing Timelines: The Reality Behind “Having It All” in Your 20s

As young adults, it’s easy to look at social media and feel like you’re falling behind. Everywhere you turn, there are influencers and peers who seem to have it all—buying houses, driving new cars, travelling to exotic locations, and living the “perfect life”, all before hitting 30. Why does everyone seem to “have it all” in their 20s?

It can make you feel inadequate- like you’re not doing enough. 

But here’s the truth: you’re not alone, and plenty of people are just getting by financially, they just don’t tend to talk about it openly.

For those who find themselves overwhelmed by financial topics, you’re not alone. That’s why we created IE Hub’s Pocket Perspectives, a podcast aimed at breaking down tricky financial subjects into simple, digestible episodes. Tune in to feel more confident about managing your finances, one episode at a time.

The Social Media Mirage

First, let’s talk about social media. It’s designed to show the best moments of people’s lives. When you’re scrolling through your feed, you’re seeing highlights, not reality. That person who just bought their first home at 25 may have had a financial advantage, received family help, or made personal sacrifices they don’t mention. And that’s okay—everyone’s journey is different.

The pressure to hit certain life milestones—like buying a house or a car—is made stronger by social media, but financial reality often tells a different story. According to recent IE Hub data, only 7.1% of 25-34 year-olds own a home and 55.9% don’t own a car. So, if you’re feeling behind, know that most people in your age group are still figuring it out too.

The Delayed Milestones Phenomenon

Expectations that society puts on us can feel like a heavy burden. Many young adults are delaying traditional financial milestones like buying a house or car, not because they don’t want them, but because today’s cost of living makes it much harder to achieve. Whether it’s student loans, low wages, or the rising cost of living, the path to financial independence is more complicated than it used to be.

The truth is that financial stability takes time, and the traditional markers of adulthood aren’t always realistic in your 20s. What you don’t see is that 24% of 18-24 year olds are still living with their parents. If you’re in this position, it’s okay—financial independence is a marathon, not a sprint.

The Emotional Toll of Financial Stress

There’s no denying that financial stress can weigh heavily on your mental health. The fear of falling behind can lead to anxiety, depression, and feelings of shame. The constant self-comparison to others who seem to have it all together can feel isolating. The reality, though, is that many of those same people are struggling too—they just aren’t talking about it publicly.

Financial stress often leads to short-term coping mechanisms like doom spending—impulse buying to temporarily feel in control or escape from stress. This behaviour can further disrupt long-term financial planning, making it harder to reach those milestones. If you’ve ever found yourself in a cycle of spending to relieve stress, check out our blog on doom spending for more insights on how this behaviour impacts financial health and how to break free from it.

It’s important to remember that financial stress doesn’t define your worth. Many young adults experience an identity crisis when they feel they aren’t financially independent. Imposter syndrome is common, with people feeling not good enough despite appearing successful on the outside. The guilt of relying on family support can make these feelings stronger, but it’s important to be kind to yourself. Financial independence takes time, and there is no set timeline for reaching it.

Reframing Financial Success

Instead of measuring yourself against society’s expectations, try changing what financial success looks like for you. Owning a house or a car may not be doable right now, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t successful. Success can be as simple as paying off a portion of your debt, building small savings habits, or even just sticking to a budget.

Focusing on these small wins helps you feel more in control of your financial situation. Set aside a small amount from each paycheck, even if it’s just £10. Small, consistent steps lead to long-term financial growth. Budgeting tools like those offered by IE Hub can help you automate your finances and keep track of your progress, allowing you to focus on what you can control.

There’s No One Timeline for Life

Everyone’s journey looks different. While social media may make it seem like everyone is achieving huge financial milestones early, the reality is that many young adults are still navigating the early stages of their careers and dealing with financial pressures like debt, and low wages. Your financial journey is unique to you, and there is no set timeline for reaching these milestones.

By focusing on your personal goals and taking small, manageable steps toward financial stability, you can regain control over your financial future without feeling like you’re falling behind. So next time you see someone who seems to “have it all” on social media, remind yourself that everyone’s path is different—and it’s okay if yours doesn’t look the same.

Final Thoughts

The pressure to succeed financially at a young age can feel overwhelming, but it’s important to recognise that there is no “right” timeline for life. Many people are struggling with the same issues you are, and social media is far from the reality of most young adults’ lives. Focus on your own path, celebrate the small victories, and remember: you’re doing just fine.